tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-49197913933374802042024-03-05T21:07:32.968-08:00that girl.amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04118985398242690262noreply@blogger.comBlogger21125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4919791393337480204.post-17907632057545858212018-10-02T23:40:00.001-07:002018-10-03T06:34:29.481-07:00High school sweethearts. High school sweethearts is a topic that I have found to be personal to me, but one that my opinion has changed of so greatly in recent times.<br />
<br />
I know that the notion of high school sweethearts is somewhat a topic of dispute, with some believing you can't know if you haven't tried anything else and others believing that when you know, you know.<br />
<br />
For me, years ago I was in the first category. I was terrified by the fact that I hadn't actually experienced anything else. I thought that because my fiancé and I had only dated one another, we could never work out forever. I believed that we needed to see what else was out there. This did put a fair but of strain on our relationship years ago. Let me tell you now, I am so glad that we pushed through those times.<br />
<br />
So glad because now my opinion has changed entirely to the latter and I feel so strongly about it. To me now, the notion of high school sweethearts is the most hope-filling, lovely thing I can think of. What's better than that unspoken bond that can only come with growing older with someone by your side? I believe that there is nothing better than knowing that yes, people change so much from high school to real life but that yes, you can grow and change with someone, not apart from someone. If you relationship has lasted all these changes and you still whole-heartedly love that person, I genuinely believe nothing can stop you.<br />
<br />
It is the best feeling looking at my fiancé knowing that I loved him when he was a 17 year old school boy, to a 20 year old uni student, to a 25 year old accountant. It is proven to me day in and day out that we know each other inside out, but that we still are learning things about each other too. Personally, I am never bored of him and his presence and I look forward to so many more years with this person I know so well. I am confident to say that I am so deeply in love with him, knowing all of him - his past, his present and hopefully his very bright future with me.<br />
<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibPpgsJ94_CL2IHZzTuV4LLwHmsynaEMcKkeS8Fm4n4z9H8A8zxzCW9njXJsNR-zqRxWQJHOwQoccQ1b9y3bLyrvtHiohVruv7DUlGMYF5pc01_MRp2P7ciGcFAMaxx2AaLJMRm10EKfc/s1600/thumbnail_IMG_4513.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="885" data-original-width="960" height="294" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibPpgsJ94_CL2IHZzTuV4LLwHmsynaEMcKkeS8Fm4n4z9H8A8zxzCW9njXJsNR-zqRxWQJHOwQoccQ1b9y3bLyrvtHiohVruv7DUlGMYF5pc01_MRp2P7ciGcFAMaxx2AaLJMRm10EKfc/s320/thumbnail_IMG_4513.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjgKHhvuNYN-SCm44MFRGjav0vc5_cx5niss1ahXWUFghzAliaNFm5Dr5xh7JQIpqazMb4mFExNsDVk5c8DoYdY-r70-P-iVr2qPdhT1Ninf1h9g-k3ofYZpRvGarQAzDScoh12ULj98b8/s1600/thumbnail_IMG_4514.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="919" data-original-width="960" height="306" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjgKHhvuNYN-SCm44MFRGjav0vc5_cx5niss1ahXWUFghzAliaNFm5Dr5xh7JQIpqazMb4mFExNsDVk5c8DoYdY-r70-P-iVr2qPdhT1Ninf1h9g-k3ofYZpRvGarQAzDScoh12ULj98b8/s320/thumbnail_IMG_4514.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiJkyVv2hyphenhyphenZXOMZ8WMz6yD_9iXKmn9lbk1_mcsflY6qOTDnDMSIZX1IM7BtIUmddCLHogEk1lLPIBOHxwFJMdHf_TtTANLqn1PIwyczdD80yq4XLjWzhfbIf_8eI4D2ci9x7QbW1OYQJcY/s1600/thumbnail_IMG_4515.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="960" data-original-width="933" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiJkyVv2hyphenhyphenZXOMZ8WMz6yD_9iXKmn9lbk1_mcsflY6qOTDnDMSIZX1IM7BtIUmddCLHogEk1lLPIBOHxwFJMdHf_TtTANLqn1PIwyczdD80yq4XLjWzhfbIf_8eI4D2ci9x7QbW1OYQJcY/s320/thumbnail_IMG_4515.jpg" width="311" /></a></div>
I've had all three of these loves with the one person - that first love, that painful love that brings growth and that true unconditional love xxamyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04118985398242690262noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4919791393337480204.post-16072942318477994912018-06-16T19:26:00.000-07:002018-06-16T19:26:23.098-07:00Love.I think I've finally learnt what it truly means to love. For a while there, I was struggling with whether loving someone in the way I was, was actually just being a pushover. But I don't think it is anymore. I think it's recognising that the love you have for that person is stronger than anything that could ever happen.<br />
<br />
My fiancé and I have been through so much together; to be honest, probably nearly more than what a lot of relationships will ever go through. This has definitely placed its challenges on us and continues to to this day, but it has also really taught me what genuine love is.<br />
<br />
I have no doubt that many people would have walked away by now if they were him or if they were me, for many different reasons. Believe me, both of us have been very close to many times. I can only speak on my behalf, but the love I have for him has drawn me back every single time.<br />
<br />
I honestly cannot express to you how much this guy means to me. How much I know deep down that regardless of what is thrown at us, I will always love him so much deeper than I ever even thought was possible. He is my absolute heart and soul, and I have really recognised that of late. I would do anything for his happiness or to strengthen our relationship. I feel just so lucky to have that type of love for someone. At such a young age still too, I am blessed. I get to go through so many different life experiences with someone who holds my heart in his hands.<br />
<br />
So to anyone who is going through anything and is questioning what it means to love someone unconditionally, trust your heart. If it is meant to be, you will get through. It will be worth it. Give your whole heart to the person you love and begin to trust them with it. It's a VERY good feeling.amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04118985398242690262noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4919791393337480204.post-79875048738587458092018-01-09T03:20:00.002-08:002018-01-09T03:20:58.528-08:0030.12.17 - aka greatest day ever.So, I've sat and stared at this blank page for a considerable amount of time. I honestly don't even know how to put into words how unbelievably happy I am right now.<br />
<br />
Remember I told you that I was going on a trip to Japan with the love of my life? Well, that trip has now ended, and it was nothing short of amazing. To this very day, I don't think I've ever had a trip where I have felt so at peace with everything, or so undeniably in love.<br />
<br />
I felt that way the entire first week we were there. And then.......<br />
<br />
The most incredible, kind-hearted, thoughtful man I have ever met ASKED ME TO MARRY HIM!!!<br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;">(and of course, I said yes!)</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><br /></span>
The poor thing dealt with my morning moodiness with the early wake up, but it was well worth it. Immediately my heart started beating out of my chest, my hands/legs began to shake and I was just super shocked and overwhelmed with what was happening. It is what I have dreamt about for so long - with him. Before him, I genuinely wanted to be the 'cool aunt' who was career focused, rather than a wife or a mother. Then I fell totally head over heels and since that moment, my perception completely changed - and now it's really happening!<br />
<br />
A week and a half on, and I am still pinching myself. I cannot believe my luck. We have spoken about it for so long but it is set in stone that I am actually truly going to marry my best friend. I know from the bottom of my heart, we are great together and will continue to be great together in all of those things that come along in life. We know each other's deepest secrets, fears, beliefs and wonderings - we get each other. You've read me write it time and time again, but I absolutely love him to death.<br />
<br />
Knowing that I am going to get to spend the rest of my life with such an amazing man gives me butterflies. I would never want to do life without him by my side and the happiness that comes with knowing that I will never have to is priceless.<br />
<br />
I know you're reading this babe, and to you I really want to say 'thank you', and I can't say it enough. Not for proposing, I know you don't want me to thank you for that. And not for the beautiful ring <span style="font-size: x-small;">(and might I say, it is bloody stunning!) </span>But thank you for the endless support and encouragement, the shoulder to cry on, the laughs and the memories. Thank you for allowing me to grow and for growing with me. Thank you for your trust, your openness and your honesty. Thank you for working through the difficult times and smiling with me through the brighter ones. Most of all, thank you for loving me. I love you, unconditionally.<br />
<br />
So it's him and I through thick and thin, ride or die, and I could not be happier!!!! xxamyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04118985398242690262noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4919791393337480204.post-42239927693278342342017-12-22T23:23:00.001-08:002017-12-22T23:23:29.085-08:00SAYONARA 2017<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11pt;">This year has been HUGE.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Plantagenet Cherokee";"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Plantagenet Cherokee";">In terms of profession, it is the year I began my career as a graduate teacher. I have never been so tired in my life, but nor have I ever felt so rewarded. I have grown through the year in so many ways and my love for what I do is only going to continue to grow. Through this, I have learnt that hard work and organisation will be rewarded. I have also learnt to be proud of who I am and what I bring, trying to doubt myself much less.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Calibri; font-size: 11.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Plantagenet Cherokee";">In my personal life, I think it has been the hardest year yet. But as it is drawing to a close, I am ecstatic to say that I am coming through the other side. I have learnt this year that communication is absolutely essential. I have also learnt the value of understanding and forgiveness. </span><span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-size: 14.666666984558105px;">I have learnt that through pretty dark times, if you honestly believe that your love for the other is deep, working through it is so worth it. I can guarantee that my love for my partner is deeper and more real than it has ever been - our souls have been stripped bare and I really do feel that our bond is stronger than ever. We have both learnt a lot about each other and I'm confident that will continue.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Calibri; font-size: 14.666666984558105px;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-size: 14.666666984558105px;">Right now, I am two days out of a trip to Japan with the love of my life. Things are looking pretty amazing. As huge as this year has been, it has given me so much that will form a large basis of next year. I will not forget the lessons I have learnt but as I move into 2018 I feel ready to move forward towards a very bright future. The feeling I have right now of a sense of contentment that comes with being calm, in love and so optimistic is priceless. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-size: 14.666666984558105px;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="font-size: 14.666666984558105px;">On that note, thank you 2017 for all you taught me, but you will probably be able to hear me from Tokyo shouting SAYONARA 2017!!!!!!!</span></span></div>
amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04118985398242690262noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4919791393337480204.post-87102876136179178472017-11-26T00:16:00.002-08:002017-11-26T00:16:59.070-08:00Newsflash.It's been a few months since I have written. Just now, I went back and read through my previous posts from this year. They left me in tears. I felt those emotions that I was feeling at the time all over again. I remembered how painful my year has been.<br />
<br />
BUT...<br />
<br />
I have great news! It's what I've been waiting for for so long.<br />
Finally, the mutual feelings I've been dreaming of are being reciprocated. He loves me!!!!<br />
I have had the most amazing couple of months. Full of spontaneity, laughs, dates, sleepovers and affection. I have felt wanted and loved in a way that I honestly hadn't felt for more than a year. The effort that I have seen from his side has been amazing, and has left me smiling day after day after day. It's all I have ever wanted!<br />
<br />
BUT...<br />
(you're wondering, how could there be another 'but'? Me too)<br />
<br />
I am so scared. Scared that my hopes are so high right now. Scared that I'm so happy.<br />
I'm scared because what am I going to do if I get crushed again? What if he decides again that he doesn't love me? I've had this great taster that I can't come back from now.<br />
<br />
I don't want to ruin it for myself with this fear and I can feel myself moving that way and doing it already. I want us to be happy and in love and together building an amazing future. I can see it now. I know that I will be forever happy with him because I can say whole heartedly that I love who he is so so so much.<br />
<br />
As the great Macklemore-ingstein said (get the reference? haha) - 'Scared of the future, thinking about the past, while missing out on now'.<br />
<br />
I can't be that way. I need to acknowledge that right now is absolutely amazing and I am so lucky to be in the position that I am. I knew we had a reason for never giving up, despite all we have been through in this past year. And that reason is now; because what we have right here, right now, is perfect.amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04118985398242690262noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4919791393337480204.post-41929533837712159422017-06-02T04:44:00.000-07:002017-06-02T04:44:37.553-07:00The fine line.There's a fine line between friends and partners.<div>
<br /><div>
Friends are scheduled in around other plans. Partners' time together is a priority.</div>
</div>
<div>
Friends do not have to necessarily think about the implications of their actions. Partners must think about how their actions affect their loved one. </div>
<div>
Friends do not share intimate affection. Partners give each other more than a kiss you'd give your grandma. </div>
<div>
Friends can omit information from each other. Partners are open and honest. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
If you're a partner, you are supposed to want to spend time with your special person. Partners do not come as a second option if you have no other plans made. Partners do not speak to their loved one as though they are insignificant. Partners do not spend every night in bed alone. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Partners are loyal and they are forgiving. They provide love even in the most trying times. They stick it out through the thick and thin. That's all I'm trying to do, and all I ever have tried to do. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
I've said it before and I'll say it again. A relationship needs to be a priority, not an option. Partners are a type of friend; a best friend. But they are way more than that too. I have lots of friends. I want that one person where we mutually adore each other unconditionally. </div>
amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04118985398242690262noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4919791393337480204.post-35762192491488829872017-05-27T04:23:00.000-07:002017-05-27T04:23:00.469-07:00The waiting game...Let me introduce you to the latest game I'm playing.<br />
It's called 'The Waiting Game'.<br />
<br />
Basically, I sit and I wait. For him to choose when I am enough, for him to choose when he feels comfortable, for him to choose when I can have girlfriend privileges, basically just for him to choose to treat me right and like I deserve.<br />
<br />
Does it sound like a fun game to you? Me neither.<br />
But, little old me has signed my name up and strapped in for the ride.<br />
Let's see if I come out on top - let the games begin.<br />
<br />amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04118985398242690262noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4919791393337480204.post-50164920658288567222017-05-21T02:01:00.001-07:002017-05-21T02:01:41.827-07:00Broken.It's really hard to accept that somebody doesn't love you anymore. It's hard to be on the receiving end of that, when you still love the person with all your heat and soul.<br />
To not have any control, regardless of what you want or how you feel, absolutely sucks. It leaves you feeling empty. Feeling like there's just no point.<br />
I understand now that that's what it feels like to have your heart broken. I know everyone says it'll pass. But it certainly doesn't feel like it in the moment.<br />
How stupid am I that I whole heartedly still want to make it work? I am genuinely still holding on to some shrivel of hope that he's going to say he realises he could never live without me and loves me to the ends of the earth. But why would he?<br />
He's told me he doesn't see me like that. I guess I can't force him. I guess I just need to accept that I'm not that person for him anymore, even if he still is the one for me.<br />
For now, I'm still waiting, hoping he'll make that move. Desperate old me, I know. Trust me, I hate myself too. But that's what love does to a person.<br />
I am so so broken, just praying he will put my pieces back together.amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04118985398242690262noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4919791393337480204.post-10064925779432687352017-05-20T00:10:00.002-07:002017-05-21T01:55:44.553-07:00I'm tired.I am so damn tired.<br />
Tired of not being good enough. Tired of putting in unreturned effort. Tired of telling myself it'll all work out. Tired of getting my hopes up. Tired of just having to accept that people's shitty mistakes can ruin your heart. Tired of loving someone who is seemingly never going to love me back.<br />
<br />
Self-worth. It's a concept that everyone may think they will hold when the time comes but it's so much easier said than done. I thought I had it.<br />
But when you're constantly pushing to be good enough for somebody to love, you lose it. You become someone craving some love and affection to make you feel you're worthy.<br />
<br />
All I want is to be loved. The way I once was. When someone used to tell me I looked gorgeous, that I was so kind, that they could never get enough of me.<br />
That's the hardest part about once having something amazing. You'll continue to compare to it. The thing is, everyone deserves that. Nobody deserves to have it ripped away.<br />
<br />
I'm beginning to lose hope that one day I'll get it. I'm beginning to believe that I'm horrible and unlovable. I guess that's what happens after some time. If someone with a seven year bond can't make you feel amazing and love you beyond doubt, how will anyone ever?<br />
<br />
I'm disappointed in how everything's turned out. I thought I was stronger than this. I thought we were stronger than this.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04118985398242690262noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4919791393337480204.post-38583554892086506982017-04-25T01:46:00.002-07:002017-04-25T01:46:58.992-07:00Please tell me.Please tell me.<br />
What do you do when your whole world is falling apart?<br />
When you're just getting hit, after hit, after hit.<br />
<br />
When your family member expresses their hatred for you?<br />
When the one person you're in love with does the same?<br />
When you've physically got nobody to turn to?<br />
<br />
Please tell me. What are you meant to do?<br />
<br />
How can I stop these tears from falling?<br />
How can I stop this constant lump in my throat?<br />
<br />
There's only so long that you can hide behind a smile.<br />
My days for that are numbered.amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04118985398242690262noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4919791393337480204.post-18336226874986390262017-04-16T22:57:00.000-07:002017-04-16T23:00:05.824-07:003 years later... My last post was titled 'Here's to 2014!' which, upon re-opening my blog, blew my mind. Where have 3 years gone? But at the same time, a lot has happened. Let me update you.<br />
<br />
Basically, since then, I have finished uni, I have gained full time employment as a teacher, I have celebrated 6 and a half years with my boyfriend and I have been on multiple trips. But here I am, still the same old me. A little older, sure. Wiser? You could say that. But at the end of the day, I'm the same curious-minded girl I've always been!<br />
<br />
You might be wondering why all of a sudden I've come back to writing. The truth is, I never stopped. The 'notes' application on your iPhone is a wonderful thing. But I'm ready now for my thoughts to be out there again.<br />
<br />
There's a lot going on in my life at the moment. Between navigating the world of full time teaching, maintaining a social life as a 23 year old and hanging onto my relationship for dear life, my mind is constantly racing. This is somewhat of my outlet.<br />
<br />
You'll have noticed that my relationship has played a feature role in my posts, and that's because it is something so near and dear to me. It is something that is constantly changing and evolving with its ups, downs and everything in between. The past six months have been tough - really tough. I've been clinging on with what feels like the tips of my fingers for a while.<br />
<br />
Let me get you up to scratch. In short, my boyfriend confessed he wasn't in love with me anymore and later I found out he cheated and had been hiding quite a secret. Now, reading that, it sounds pretty self-explanatory. I'm sure you're wondering why I'm still so in love. Oh, for the record, I am soooo bloody in love. Well, firstly, his 'secret', I feel humbled that he trusted me enough to share that with me. I know that confessing what he had done would have been ridiculously difficult. Of course, initially, I was furious, but upon reflection, it shows me how strong and trusting our bond is that he would feel he can finally be truthful about it all. My only hope is that this truth is upheld going forward.<br />
<br />
I feel as though now we have moved from that issue, and I'm pacing back to the 'in love' one. I am trying so hard to keep our relationship going. Remember my post back in 2012 where I mentioned being completely, 100% all in? Well, that was 5 years ago and the thing is, that entire time since then, I've been entirely invested. You can read my posts back, there is no doubt he was definitely invested. But something had changed recently and he'd lost interest. My hope is that now that we are starting fresh and maintaining a completely open relationship, his interest regains and he falls back in love.<br />
<br />
I'm for sure giving it everything in me, but now an internal battle remains. I've been being completely honest with my feelings, showering him in love and affection and I feel as though that's not working. So do I pull back and hold my feelings a little closer to my chest to see if he meets me halfway? Or do I keep showing him how insanely loved he is? I know I can't really force anything, but he means the absolute world to me and I don't ever want to think about losing him. When we are good, he honestly makes me so happy. But I just crave that affection we once had - the kind where he would be the one to kiss me first, or to hug me from behind, give me a forehead kiss, tell me he loves me first etc. Those nostalgic feelings bring a smile to my face. Will we ever have that again? Please, tell me this was our low and we are only onwards and upwards from here. Please.amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04118985398242690262noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4919791393337480204.post-84652948974703080322014-01-01T23:14:00.002-08:002014-01-01T23:14:54.106-08:00Here's to 2014!
<style>
<!--
/* Font Definitions */
@font-face
{font-family:"MS 明朝";
mso-font-charset:78;
mso-generic-font-family:auto;
mso-font-pitch:variable;
mso-font-signature:1 134676480 16 0 131072 0;}
@font-face
{font-family:"Cambria Math";
panose-1:2 4 5 3 5 4 6 3 2 4;
mso-font-charset:0;
mso-generic-font-family:auto;
mso-font-pitch:variable;
mso-font-signature:-536870145 1107305727 0 0 415 0;}
@font-face
{font-family:Cambria;
panose-1:2 4 5 3 5 4 6 3 2 4;
mso-font-charset:0;
mso-generic-font-family:auto;
mso-font-pitch:variable;
mso-font-signature:-536870145 1073743103 0 0 415 0;}
/* Style Definitions */
p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal
{mso-style-unhide:no;
mso-style-qformat:yes;
mso-style-parent:"";
margin:0cm;
margin-bottom:.0001pt;
mso-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:12.0pt;
font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-font-family:"MS 明朝";
mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast;
mso-hansi-font-family:Cambria;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";
mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;
mso-ansi-language:EN-US;}
.MsoChpDefault
{mso-style-type:export-only;
mso-default-props:yes;
font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-font-family:"MS 明朝";
mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast;
mso-hansi-font-family:Cambria;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";
mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;
mso-ansi-language:EN-US;}
@page WordSection1
{size:612.0pt 792.0pt;
margin:72.0pt 90.0pt 72.0pt 90.0pt;
mso-header-margin:36.0pt;
mso-footer-margin:36.0pt;
mso-paper-source:0;}
div.WordSection1
{page:WordSection1;}
-->
</style>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">New Years. The one day of the year that we
see an official day of new beginnings, limitless possibilities and countless
opportunities. It is a day that we take to reflect on the year that has been,
as well as look into what we aspire for the year ahead. I don’t have any of the
traditional resolutions, to get fit, get a new job etc, but rather some more
philosophically based ones, I suppose. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">The first, to ensure that I <i><b>live each
moment to the fullest.</b></i> It is true that you do not realize the true value of a moment
until it becomes a memory, so this year I want to soak up each and every moment
while it lasts. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">The second, to<i><b> be grateful</b></i>. Seems easy and
pretty self-explanatory, but I endeavor to ensure each and every day I
recognize my countless blessings; my good health, roof over my head and amazing
family and friends. I often fall victim to wishing and wanting things sometimes
selfishly considering how lucky I am to have what I have. This year I want to
try to completely minimize this.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Next, to <i><b>not worry about what others think</b></i>
and <i><b>know my true worth.</b></i> This is a huge one for me, but I am going to try this
year to do what makes me happy and just plain and simply be me, and not worry
about what anybody else thinks about it. I aim to ooze confidence this year, with
some good self-love and appreciation! </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">These hopes for the year ahead are
especially important to me this year as this year I had my first encounter of
death in my family. It demonstrated to me how quickly things can change and how
fleetingly things can be taken away from you. I came to realize that life is
something precious and that when that day of death does come, I want to be sure
that I am proud of the life I lived, and have no regrets. This year, my main
goal is to just be <b>HAPPY</b>. Happy with myself as a person, and happy with the
decisions I make. <i><b>So here’s to 2014, let’s make it a good one!</b></i> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZjTqnudXqE-UWj4DjRJxJMDvUAL_A6LPE8sn2HK60QS1ZYg1MA_wI1RkCmowlJJXBkwEXei4OyosehOPA30S-cjhNIbkno8oHhPfJp6sKo7uY3qzwlcLIoflkQUY_HrzkvuNRE6zv-5E/s1600/black-and-white-dream-faith-feeling-happiness-Favim.com-210883.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="129" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZjTqnudXqE-UWj4DjRJxJMDvUAL_A6LPE8sn2HK60QS1ZYg1MA_wI1RkCmowlJJXBkwEXei4OyosehOPA30S-cjhNIbkno8oHhPfJp6sKo7uY3qzwlcLIoflkQUY_HrzkvuNRE6zv-5E/s320/black-and-white-dream-faith-feeling-happiness-Favim.com-210883.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04118985398242690262noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4919791393337480204.post-78338281008103591192013-05-05T18:26:00.000-07:002013-05-05T18:26:55.851-07:00that's how I know.
<style>
<!--
/* Font Definitions */
@font-face
{font-family:"MS 明朝";
panose-1:0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0;
mso-font-charset:128;
mso-generic-font-family:roman;
mso-font-format:other;
mso-font-pitch:fixed;
mso-font-signature:1 134676480 16 0 131072 0;}
@font-face
{font-family:"MS 明朝";
panose-1:0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0;
mso-font-charset:128;
mso-generic-font-family:roman;
mso-font-format:other;
mso-font-pitch:fixed;
mso-font-signature:1 134676480 16 0 131072 0;}
@font-face
{font-family:Cambria;
panose-1:2 4 5 3 5 4 6 3 2 4;
mso-font-charset:0;
mso-generic-font-family:auto;
mso-font-pitch:variable;
mso-font-signature:-536870145 1073743103 0 0 415 0;}
/* Style Definitions */
p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal
{mso-style-unhide:no;
mso-style-qformat:yes;
mso-style-parent:"";
margin:0cm;
margin-bottom:.0001pt;
mso-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:12.0pt;
font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-font-family:"MS 明朝";
mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast;
mso-hansi-font-family:Cambria;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";
mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;
mso-ansi-language:EN-US;}
.MsoChpDefault
{mso-style-type:export-only;
mso-default-props:yes;
font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-font-family:"MS 明朝";
mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast;
mso-hansi-font-family:Cambria;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";
mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;
mso-ansi-language:EN-US;}
@page WordSection1
{size:595.0pt 842.0pt;
margin:72.0pt 90.0pt 72.0pt 90.0pt;
mso-header-margin:35.4pt;
mso-footer-margin:35.4pt;
mso-paper-source:0;}
div.WordSection1
{page:WordSection1;}
-->
</style>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span lang="EN-US">Forever is a long time.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span lang="EN-US">A really, really, really, realllly long
time. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span lang="EN-US">Like, your whole life.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span lang="EN-US">And I’m not sure of much very often.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span lang="EN-US">But I am sure of one thing. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span lang="EN-US">I want to spend my forever with him.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span lang="EN-US">You know those moments where you just know?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span lang="EN-US">This is one of them.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span lang="EN-US">Something just clicks.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span lang="EN-US">Every moment spent with him is great. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span lang="EN-US">No matter what we are doing. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span lang="EN-US">That’s how I know. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span lang="EN-US">Every time he smiles at me my heart flips. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span lang="EN-US">That’s how I know. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span lang="EN-US">If it's me and him, nothing else matters.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span lang="EN-US">That's how I know. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span lang="EN-US">I would do anything to ensure his
happiness. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span lang="EN-US">That’s how I know.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span lang="EN-US">Time not spent with him feels like time
wasted. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span lang="EN-US">That’s how I know. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span lang="EN-US">When I see my future, I can’t see it
without him in it. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span lang="EN-US">That is how I really know. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span lang="EN-US">Forever and always,</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span lang="EN-US">And that’s a promise.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span lang="EN-US"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>-
xx - </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span lang="EN-US"> </span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3Ebrlxrp_asrqV2XHQytsPS9g2XbOYWqnbeFA0VLoEmF46jhsDwQSiujMoPLpQ4b8wIE4K8F5i9OsKWmAkkL5xQ_VOtGAM9v1soswYMfokKNl0aEE5r0LAbPojIZmbm7brfGW_JIFwf4/s1600/black-and-white-couple-hands-love-marriage-Favim.com-401528.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3Ebrlxrp_asrqV2XHQytsPS9g2XbOYWqnbeFA0VLoEmF46jhsDwQSiujMoPLpQ4b8wIE4K8F5i9OsKWmAkkL5xQ_VOtGAM9v1soswYMfokKNl0aEE5r0LAbPojIZmbm7brfGW_JIFwf4/s320/black-and-white-couple-hands-love-marriage-Favim.com-401528.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span lang="EN-US"> </span></div>
amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04118985398242690262noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4919791393337480204.post-87955706829812736172012-12-30T20:42:00.001-08:002012-12-30T20:42:58.585-08:00goodbye 2012.<style>
<!--
/* Font Definitions */
@font-face
{font-family:"MS 明朝";
panose-1:0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0;
mso-font-charset:128;
mso-generic-font-family:roman;
mso-font-format:other;
mso-font-pitch:fixed;
mso-font-signature:1 134676480 16 0 131072 0;}
@font-face
{font-family:"MS 明朝";
panose-1:0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0;
mso-font-charset:128;
mso-generic-font-family:roman;
mso-font-format:other;
mso-font-pitch:fixed;
mso-font-signature:1 134676480 16 0 131072 0;}
@font-face
{font-family:Cambria;
panose-1:2 4 5 3 5 4 6 3 2 4;
mso-font-charset:0;
mso-generic-font-family:auto;
mso-font-pitch:variable;
mso-font-signature:3 0 0 0 1 0;}
/* Style Definitions */
p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal
{mso-style-unhide:no;
mso-style-qformat:yes;
mso-style-parent:"";
margin:0cm;
margin-bottom:.0001pt;
mso-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:12.0pt;
font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-font-family:"MS 明朝";
mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast;
mso-hansi-font-family:Cambria;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";
mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;
mso-ansi-language:EN-US;}
.MsoChpDefault
{mso-style-type:export-only;
mso-default-props:yes;
font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-font-family:"MS 明朝";
mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast;
mso-hansi-font-family:Cambria;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";
mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;
mso-ansi-language:EN-US;}
@page WordSection1
{size:595.0pt 842.0pt;
margin:72.0pt 90.0pt 72.0pt 90.0pt;
mso-header-margin:35.4pt;
mso-footer-margin:35.4pt;
mso-paper-source:0;}
div.WordSection1
{page:WordSection1;}
</style> <span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif; font-size: small;">Living in the society we do today, we often
keep looking forward, wishing for tomorrow, instead of remembering to look
back, and reflect that all that has happened and all that we have learnt. </span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: small;">This is no more true than on New Years Eve.
We find ourselves making resolutions for the year ahead, wishing for a better,
bigger, brighter year. We forget that it brings another aspect, and that is
reflection.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: small;">I too, often fall victim of this. But
today, on the last day of 2012, I have decided to take a moment to reflect on
the year that was.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: small;">This year, I learnt more than I have ever
learnt before. It’s been eventful, had its ups and downs but I am grateful for
every single experience. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: small;">Long story short, this year I have:</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: small;">- had my first year out of highschool</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: small;">- started a uni course</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: small;">- dropped out of a uni course</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: small;">- worked 3 jobs</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: small;">- quit 2 jobs</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: small;">- got a promotion to management</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: small;">- celebrated 2 years with my boyfriend</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: small;">- volunteered overseas in Vietnam</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: small;">- travelled to Thailand</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: small;">- been to Queensland</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: small;">- been to Sydney twice</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: small;">- figured out what I want to do as a career</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: small;">I could go on longer, but I’ll spare you
the details. The point is, yes, the year starts again, time ticks over, but the
year you have just had shouldn’t lose any value. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: small;">Take some time to list everything that has
happened to you this year, good or bad, and try to tell me that last New Years
you had that planned. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: small;">The resolutions we make today for the year
ahead will be only a tiny speck of what you can expect to come your way.
Writing this right now, I know that when I read this back in a years time I
will laugh at how I had no idea of what was in store for me this year. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: small;">So, this year, my main resolution is to
live in the moment as positively as I can. To embrace every opportunity I
receive and to spend my year the happiest version of myself I can be. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: small;">They say your life flashes before your eyes
when you’re nearing your death, but truth is, the past year flashes before your
eyes every New Years Eve, so <i><span style="font-size: large;">let’s do our best to make sure it’s worth
watching. </span></i></span></div>
<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjelGhiw87C1hzjefgzhvY-hcHaFrQGEl6-BJ-Mkl2fLsITSJ7GOVfgZSHBNdOUWQx0bpT8CpQGDHAJY9XtidvZJ9CjSozYS9dtU1uGuUZIEc3JGBCFZzJPZG-O60SXbFq4c7g_Bfa2m0I/s1600/Black_and_White_Fireworks.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjelGhiw87C1hzjefgzhvY-hcHaFrQGEl6-BJ-Mkl2fLsITSJ7GOVfgZSHBNdOUWQx0bpT8CpQGDHAJY9XtidvZJ9CjSozYS9dtU1uGuUZIEc3JGBCFZzJPZG-O60SXbFq4c7g_Bfa2m0I/s320/Black_and_White_Fireworks.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04118985398242690262noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4919791393337480204.post-73085369058324659472012-07-02T16:45:00.002-07:002012-07-20T07:09:32.311-07:00month of clarity.<div style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span style="font-size: small;">The month of July is now underway, and I want to take this month to
appreciate all that goes on. </span></div>
<div style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span style="font-size: small;">To </span><span style="font-size: small;">reflect on the positives, rather than
dwell on the negatives. </span></div>
<div style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span style="font-size: small;">So, each day, I will record the highlight of my day, something to be positive about. As the days pass and the list grows, I'm sure
clarity will be a new element introduced into my day to day life.</span></div>
<div style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><b>July 1st</b> - After a long day at work, I got to spend the night
with my amazing boyfriend on a cute and cosy 'date' at the drive-in.</span></div>
<div style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><b>July
2nd</b> - Spending the night with my family, including my best friend and
boyfriend made me thankful for the incredible people I do have in my life. Seeing my sister and boyfriend laugh together made my night.</span><br />
<b><span style="font-size: small;">July 3rd </span></b><span style="font-size: small;">- A much needed afternoon with my mum and sister completed my day as I had missed going out with them for weekends so much.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><b>July 4th - </b>A surprise visit after work from my boyfriend made my 12 hour working day so much better. Not to mention my favourite chocolate bar he bought me. </span><br />
<b><span style="font-size: small;">July 5th </span></b><span style="font-size: small;">- </span>Being chafuerred around all day, to work, to Highpoint, to get icecream, was great.<br />
<b>July 6th </b>- Celebrated 23 months of something amazing. The best part was seeing a shooting star and not even having to wish on it.<br />
<b>July 7th </b>- A night out at the circus with a few people I love put a smile on my face and gave me something to look forward to.<br />
<b>July 8th </b>- One of the first nights I spent just lazying around at home after work. Felt good to have nowhere I needed to be but home.<br />
<b>July 9th </b>- I love nothing more than a quiet night in, with a DVD and some snacks.<br />
<b>July 10th </b>- Nothing better than giving yourself some time to shop for yourself.<br />
<b>July 11th </b>- An extremely long 12 hour day at work, but one that ended positively with two whole days off to look forward to!<br />
<b>July 12th </b>- After a long reflection, finally quit a job that was a little too rigid for my liking. Very empowering feeling.<br />
<b>July 13th </b>- A special day out with my favourite person in the entire world made my day a lot brighter. With the celebrations continuing into the night, I felt so happy to have been there this year after missing the previous year. This date on the calendar will be important to me forever.<br />
<b>July 14th </b>- First weekend off in seven months felt great and celebrating my boy once again was an even better feeling! Ending the night with sickness was a downside but also an eye opener as to how much of a lucky girl I am.<br />
<b>July 15th </b>- Spent the day watching movies with my family for the first time on a weekend in months. Didn't realise how much I had missed that feeling until today.<br />
<b>July 16th - </b>Had dinner cooked for me at my boyfriends and a quiet night in.. Consolidated to me that I could have nights like that forever.<br />
<b>July 17th </b>- At the end of the day I realised that when it's just him and I, I literally am worry free, which is quite a rarity for me.<br />
<b>July 18th </b>- A long overdue sleepover with my best friend was the perfect ending to my day.<br />
<b>July 19th </b>- Spent some time assessing my future. Putting a positive spin on the indecisiveness of myself, I say, at least I'm open to plenty of options!<br />
<b>July 20th </b>- One word, perfect. Perfect date with the perfect boy. No better feeling than hearing someone special say you look pretty or that they can't imagine life without you. You see it written all the time, but in person is a whole other level. <br />
<br />
<b>Lesson #1: </b>The dictionary defines family as:<span class="dnindex"><span id="hotword"><span id="hotword" name="hotword"></span> </span></span><br />
<div class="dndata">
<span id="hotword"><span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: #333333; cursor: default;">Family: [n] a</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: #333333; cursor: default;">basic</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: #333333; cursor: default;">social</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: #333333; cursor: default;">unit</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: #333333; cursor: default;">consisting</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">of</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: #333333; cursor: default;">parents</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: #333333; cursor: default;">and</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword">their</span> <span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: #333333; cursor: default;">children.</span></span></div>
<div class="dndata">
<span id="hotword"><span id="hotword" name="hotword" style="color: #333333; cursor: default;"></span></span>Growing up, that's what I had always believed. Family was my
parents and my sister. But I learnt so far this month that it's much
more than that. It's those people in your life that you love
unconditionally, whether they're related by blood or not. My best
friend, my boyfriend, a few others, they're family. And there's nothing
in this world more important than family.<br />
<br />
<b>Lesson #2: </b>Who am I living for?<br />
If your answer to this was 'me', then you know its time to do what makes you happy. Myself, I find it difficult to say no to people, I am constantly thinking of what the consequences for them will be, rather than putting myself first and doing what makes me happy. I learnt this month that I'm only going to be young once, so I need to make the most of it. I don't want to spend every weekend cooped up in an office, I want to spend time with family and friends and enjoy life. The money might be good, but what's sacrificed isn't worth it. Big lesson learnt.<br />
<br />
<b>Lesson #3: </b>Sometimes the best things result from the worst things.<br />
Vomiting endlessly is not a positive thing, at all. I learnt this the hard way a few nights ago. But, from this negative experience, I also learnt something else. I learnt that sometimes some really good things can come out of something not so good. That night, I truly and honestly felt such love from my boyfriend. We weren't kissing (he would not have gone there with me in that state haha), we weren't hugging, we were barely even speaking, but the love I felt was more present than ever. He cared for me all night, despite my un-appealing mess of self that I was, he loved me and was 100% there for me. Lesson learnt, never underestimate the power of a bad situation to bring out the best.</div>
</div>
<br />
<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgh8D0AbwRN0qqkyNflVr5SYQtSHv-pw5QLAym53dyUQwQumXqfeBemoyxF8rrYrlz-bY2F4pSPmE7odQbraoru4ne_JGlRnYBllaIlZBuAQKZsPvdpKFx_MS1brNMv13y-L1GlsV1UtAo/s1600/sayings-about-relationships.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgh8D0AbwRN0qqkyNflVr5SYQtSHv-pw5QLAym53dyUQwQumXqfeBemoyxF8rrYrlz-bY2F4pSPmE7odQbraoru4ne_JGlRnYBllaIlZBuAQKZsPvdpKFx_MS1brNMv13y-L1GlsV1UtAo/s320/sayings-about-relationships.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04118985398242690262noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4919791393337480204.post-3835981296947832462012-06-09T04:47:00.001-07:002012-06-09T04:54:57.275-07:00you know who you are.<style>
<!--
/* Font Definitions */
@font-face
{font-family:"MS 明朝";
mso-font-charset:78;
mso-generic-font-family:auto;
mso-font-pitch:variable;
mso-font-signature:1 134676480 16 0 131072 0;}
@font-face
{font-family:"Cambria Math";
panose-1:2 4 5 3 5 4 6 3 2 4;
mso-font-charset:0;
mso-generic-font-family:auto;
mso-font-pitch:variable;
mso-font-signature:3 0 0 0 1 0;}
@font-face
{font-family:Cambria;
panose-1:2 4 5 3 5 4 6 3 2 4;
mso-font-charset:0;
mso-generic-font-family:auto;
mso-font-pitch:variable;
mso-font-signature:-536870145 1073743103 0 0 415 0;}
/* Style Definitions */
p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal
{mso-style-unhide:no;
mso-style-qformat:yes;
mso-style-parent:"";
margin:0cm;
margin-bottom:.0001pt;
mso-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:12.0pt;
font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-font-family:"MS 明朝";
mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast;
mso-hansi-font-family:Cambria;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";
mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;
mso-ansi-language:EN-US;}
.MsoChpDefault
{mso-style-type:export-only;
mso-default-props:yes;
font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-font-family:"MS 明朝";
mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast;
mso-hansi-font-family:Cambria;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";
mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;
mso-ansi-language:EN-US;}
@page WordSection1
{size:595.0pt 842.0pt;
margin:72.0pt 90.0pt 72.0pt 90.0pt;
mso-header-margin:35.4pt;
mso-footer-margin:35.4pt;
mso-paper-source:0;}
div.WordSection1
{page:WordSection1;}
-->
</style>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">When I think of the word ‘love’, all I can
think about is you. The concept of loving someone else seems unfathomable,
quite frankly, it seems completely out of the picture. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Over two years ago now you came into my
life. You’d been in my life before, but as more of an extra rather than a lead.
But two years ago, at 16 years of age, you took the lead. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">It’s funny, really, all of a sudden, to me
you weren’t that person that I’d kind of known from primary school. You became
this intriguing, some may say ‘amazing’ person that I wanted to get to know. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">As our friendship began to form and we, as
much as I hate to admit it, began to flirt, the butterflies I began to feel in
my stomach made it evident to me that I would love for it to eventuate to
something more. And, after what I can appreciate to be a build up of courage,
on that day in June it became exactly that. Unofficial, of course, but ‘seeing
each other’ was good enough for me.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">First date jitters came, as would be
expected, but what I did not know at that time, was that this first date would
be one of many to come. Looking back, the innocence of it all was what made it
so special. Both so frightened to hold each others hand, to look like a fool,
to order a cheeseburger the way I like it, seems so juvenile now. But the
nervousness and the anxiousness was all a part of it.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">A few dates on and the day of officiality
arrived. The nervous ‘Tell him you have a boyfriend” scenario smoothly took
place transitioning into asking me to be your girlfriend, with of course, a
more than delighted acceptance followed by a face-reddening kiss on the cheek.
The memory is so clear as though it was only yesterday. Progressing on that
night, the first hand hold. Butterflies going crazy as soon as you go in for
the grab, and maintaining themselves there pretty much until the end of the
night, or to be honest, pretty much still here to this day.</span><br />
<span lang="EN-US">Then, the first kiss. On that unsuspecting night in August, the moment you took my hand and led me outside, those butterflies appeared more than ever. You told me you loved me and leaned in. At that moment, I could have been anywhere in the world and it would have felt like I was in the middle of Paris in front of a beautiful backdrop of the Eiffel Tower. I could've been in the middle of a war for all I knew, because at that moment, everything else blurred and to this day, the best kiss of my life occured. Despite the lack of experience and the incredibly unguided tongue I probably would have had, that kiss was one I will never forget for the rest of my life. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Months go by, blissfully and swiftly as
ever, and, as any good story, the negative climax. The break up that wasn’t
really. I say ‘the negative climax’ because that was a low point in some
respects, but to me it worked in our favour, it only made us stronger and get
to where we are now. And I say, ‘that
wasn’t really’ because like it or not, those feelings we have for each other
continued to be present, hence us being together here and now.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">The here and now is a part of the story I
want to touch on. I can’t change the past, but what I can do is write about
what I know now, and how I feel now. To this day, after this long journey that
unofficially has been going for over 2 years, I still have those crazy in
love*, undeniable feelings for you. You are absolutely the best thing that has
ever happened to me and <span style="font-size: x-large;">I love you</span> unconditionally. You provide me with a guaranteed reason to smile. No
matter what life throws at me, no matter how bad I’m feeling or how sorry for
myself I’m feeling, all I need to think of is you. And then I immediately recall
how lucky I am that God gave you to me. Such a special gift, and one that
unlike a lot of gifts, I won’t use for a little bit then get rid of. One that,
I can say with utter confidence, I will have forever. I promise you now that
you have my heart, today, tomorrow and every day after that.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span lang="EN-US">*subtle Beyonce quote, just for you</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQWA9Nv4g7OPhnQ3lCZ0O4doweTX87GFFCMvK4Btug0qBKu1A1XJBFF2IdTTZh9q6MseacHbLMa2Lv5Ea1j0jh9iFJcFRSx_2TFB9iXMxnNdxY_6Cr7BFbs5Yq6g72QVV_R-5mg4O_YjQ/s1600/rock%252Cn%252Crose%252Ccontemporary%252Cvintag-04f276a8cdd8adf271715f2acc6251fd_m.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQWA9Nv4g7OPhnQ3lCZ0O4doweTX87GFFCMvK4Btug0qBKu1A1XJBFF2IdTTZh9q6MseacHbLMa2Lv5Ea1j0jh9iFJcFRSx_2TFB9iXMxnNdxY_6Cr7BFbs5Yq6g72QVV_R-5mg4O_YjQ/s1600/rock%252Cn%252Crose%252Ccontemporary%252Cvintag-04f276a8cdd8adf271715f2acc6251fd_m.jpg" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04118985398242690262noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4919791393337480204.post-31417207615800966582012-05-28T22:40:00.001-07:002012-06-09T04:42:18.535-07:00miss you?<style>
<!--
/* Font Definitions */
@font-face
{font-family:"MS 明朝";
mso-font-charset:78;
mso-generic-font-family:auto;
mso-font-pitch:variable;
mso-font-signature:1 134676480 16 0 131072 0;}
@font-face
{font-family:"Cambria Math";
panose-1:2 4 5 3 5 4 6 3 2 4;
mso-font-charset:0;
mso-generic-font-family:auto;
mso-font-pitch:variable;
mso-font-signature:3 0 0 0 1 0;}
@font-face
{font-family:Cambria;
panose-1:2 4 5 3 5 4 6 3 2 4;
mso-font-charset:0;
mso-generic-font-family:auto;
mso-font-pitch:variable;
mso-font-signature:-536870145 1073743103 0 0 415 0;}
/* Style Definitions */
p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal
{mso-style-unhide:no;
mso-style-qformat:yes;
mso-style-parent:"";
margin:0cm;
margin-bottom:.0001pt;
mso-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:12.0pt;
font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-font-family:"MS 明朝";
mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast;
mso-hansi-font-family:Cambria;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";
mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;
mso-ansi-language:EN-US;}
.MsoChpDefault
{mso-style-type:export-only;
mso-default-props:yes;
font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-font-family:"MS 明朝";
mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast;
mso-hansi-font-family:Cambria;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";
mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;
mso-ansi-language:EN-US;}
@page WordSection1
{size:612.0pt 792.0pt;
margin:72.0pt 90.0pt 72.0pt 90.0pt;
mso-header-margin:36.0pt;
mso-footer-margin:36.0pt;
mso-paper-source:0;}
div.WordSection1
{page:WordSection1;}
-->
</style>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Who do you turn to when you have nobody to
turn to? </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Lately, I’ve found myself drifting. Trying,
trying, trying, but drifting. My friends and I all made a pact before finishing
highschool that we would keep in contact and be friends forever, but lately that
idea seems to be becoming more and more of a distant memory. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">I totally get that people have uni to
attend, jobs to work and sports to play, but what I don’t get is not having one
spare hour to meet up and chat. Or five spare minutes to send a text to see how
you are. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">It does get frustrating, because I
sometimes feel as though I am making more of an effort than others. I’m always
the one texting ‘Hey haven’t spoken in a while, how are you?’ or inviting
‘Dinner whenever anyone’s free next week?’ and it constantly seems like too
much of an effort, like I’m being a hassle to them.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">I don’t go to uni right now, so I don’t get
that interaction with each other that they get. The only person I really get to
see from highschool regularly is my boyfriend. Not that I’m complaining about
that, because he is the one person who is there for me through thick and thin,
and who makes time for me. I love that. I just wish my friends could do the same… </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjNk143c08jumaC-ZXBCdf8fPuYJwfky3rYgIc_8caDJ1qbx2VGlEh6Zda0GKRqYf4kg54pKW_PKCu5bxI9T0ykv5vdXjfFqs8g5mTGkHUCCHyN71AlNVNhgsMAhugQ2bbvlSL8odUnjis/s1600/art,black,and,white,cute,and,fun,friendship,photography,woman-b3b8babd04c0d8024ff25f72405c0303_m.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjNk143c08jumaC-ZXBCdf8fPuYJwfky3rYgIc_8caDJ1qbx2VGlEh6Zda0GKRqYf4kg54pKW_PKCu5bxI9T0ykv5vdXjfFqs8g5mTGkHUCCHyN71AlNVNhgsMAhugQ2bbvlSL8odUnjis/s1600/art,black,and,white,cute,and,fun,friendship,photography,woman-b3b8babd04c0d8024ff25f72405c0303_m.jpg" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04118985398242690262noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4919791393337480204.post-90384495981291023772012-05-21T04:36:00.004-07:002012-05-21T05:00:55.344-07:00snapshot of appreciation.<style>
<!--
/* Font Definitions */
@font-face
{font-family:"MS 明朝";
mso-font-charset:78;
mso-generic-font-family:auto;
mso-font-pitch:variable;
mso-font-signature:1 134676480 16 0 131072 0;}
@font-face
{font-family:"MS 明朝";
mso-font-charset:78;
mso-generic-font-family:auto;
mso-font-pitch:variable;
mso-font-signature:1 134676480 16 0 131072 0;}
@font-face
{font-family:Cambria;
panose-1:2 4 5 3 5 4 6 3 2 4;
mso-font-charset:0;
mso-generic-font-family:auto;
mso-font-pitch:variable;
mso-font-signature:-536870145 1073743103 0 0 415 0;}
/* Style Definitions */
p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal
{mso-style-unhide:no;
mso-style-qformat:yes;
mso-style-parent:"";
margin:0cm;
margin-bottom:.0001pt;
mso-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:12.0pt;
font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-font-family:"MS 明朝";
mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast;
mso-hansi-font-family:Cambria;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";
mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;
mso-ansi-language:EN-US;}
.MsoChpDefault
{mso-style-type:export-only;
mso-default-props:yes;
font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-font-family:"MS 明朝";
mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast;
mso-hansi-font-family:Cambria;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";
mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;
mso-ansi-language:EN-US;}
@page WordSection1
{size:595.0pt 842.0pt;
margin:72.0pt 90.0pt 72.0pt 90.0pt;
mso-header-margin:35.4pt;
mso-footer-margin:35.4pt;
mso-paper-source:0;}
div.WordSection1
{page:WordSection1;}
-->
</style>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">That moment. That clarity. That
appreciation.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">It hit me recently. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">In life, time is crucial. You don’t
get a lot of it, and the time you do get needs to be spent wisely. Surrounded
by the people you love, by the people who love you. I’ve learnt that wasting
time on things that really don’t deserve all that time and attention is
juvenile, it’s unnecessary. I’ve learnt that if someone’s worth your time, then
they should also make the effort. But most of all, I’ve learnt to appreciate
what I have now.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">It’s become apparent to me that worrying
about the future or being apprehensive is no good. For the most part, I refer
to this in regards to relationships. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Being scared that you’re going to lose that
person and holding back, is what’s going to make you lose them in the end.
Being afraid they may harm you, is only harming yourself. Funny, isn’t it? The
things we are afraid of them doing are really what we are already doing to
ourselves.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">I watched a movie recently, where the
character learnt that you need to take life by the arm and run with it. Enjoy
what you have now and follow your heart. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">I have begun to apply this to my own life.
I can recognize the potential now, and I have 100% let my guard down. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">As much as I wanted to believe before that
it wasn’t up anymore, after almost 22 months, almost 2 years, I finally felt it
drop. The shield that I had continued to put up and pin other reasons on was no
longer there. No longer will I bring up “do we need a break to see what if?”,
no longer will I be uncertain; from here on out I will take it day by day,
focusing on the feelings I have now and what my heart tells me now. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">In reality, why let something so good pass
me by? There’s absolutely nothing wrong with the relationship I have. In fact,
it’s pretty perfect. And maybe that’s what scared me; the fact that I can not
name a flaw, the fact that there’s not a thing I don’t like about the
relationship, and the fact that I can truly see myself in this for the rest of
my life. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Maybe it was a little too much for me to
process. But now, I’m in it. I’m well and truly in it. I’m ready to commit to
that, to make an effort, to do everything I can to make it work, to push those fears aside, to keep those
undying feelings alive. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">He doesn’t make it hard though, let me say
that. Most lovable, cute, kind, thoughtful, loyal boy on the planet. He is what some would refer to as the safe option,
yes, but to me he’s also the only option. And right here, right now, today, although only a snapshot of appreciation written, I appreciate all that I have.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgeA0pOTxaxnly_RVKYKAvVL7AZmyyZrrXKWbP1DZW140DhB4kKnPBt5l36O1vStpAdvKcLGGAwHBvdD0hsnZj5t-IL0Fip3w8a3uomXzHSD9wAT_xRX6MTAmr7hyphenhyphenMpJR6nkj5xA4IsPLM/s1600/black-and-white-couple-photography-Favim.com-263558.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="246" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgeA0pOTxaxnly_RVKYKAvVL7AZmyyZrrXKWbP1DZW140DhB4kKnPBt5l36O1vStpAdvKcLGGAwHBvdD0hsnZj5t-IL0Fip3w8a3uomXzHSD9wAT_xRX6MTAmr7hyphenhyphenMpJR6nkj5xA4IsPLM/s320/black-and-white-couple-photography-Favim.com-263558.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04118985398242690262noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4919791393337480204.post-13191742425662054892012-04-21T23:25:00.003-07:002012-04-21T23:32:17.264-07:00buckle up and enjoy the ride.<style>
<!--
/* Font Definitions */
@font-face
{font-family:"MS 明朝";
mso-font-charset:78;
mso-generic-font-family:auto;
mso-font-pitch:variable;
mso-font-signature:1 134676480 16 0 131072 0;}
@font-face
{font-family:"Cambria Math";
panose-1:2 4 5 3 5 4 6 3 2 4;
mso-font-charset:0;
mso-generic-font-family:auto;
mso-font-pitch:variable;
mso-font-signature:3 0 0 0 1 0;}
@font-face
{font-family:Cambria;
panose-1:2 4 5 3 5 4 6 3 2 4;
mso-font-charset:0;
mso-generic-font-family:auto;
mso-font-pitch:variable;
mso-font-signature:-536870145 1073743103 0 0 415 0;}
/* Style Definitions */
p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal
{mso-style-unhide:no;
mso-style-qformat:yes;
mso-style-parent:"";
margin:0cm;
margin-bottom:.0001pt;
mso-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:12.0pt;
font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-font-family:"MS 明朝";
mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast;
mso-hansi-font-family:Cambria;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";
mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;
mso-ansi-language:EN-US;}
.MsoChpDefault
{mso-style-type:export-only;
mso-default-props:yes;
font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-font-family:"MS 明朝";
mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast;
mso-hansi-font-family:Cambria;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";
mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;
mso-ansi-language:EN-US;}
@page WordSection1
{size:595.0pt 842.0pt;
margin:72.0pt 90.0pt 72.0pt 90.0pt;
mso-header-margin:35.4pt;
mso-footer-margin:35.4pt;
mso-paper-source:0;}
div.WordSection1
{page:WordSection1;}
-->
</style>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: small;">As I’m sitting here today watching the rain
drizzle down outside my window, it allows me a brief moment to sit and reflect.
A moment to step away from the busy lifestyle we all lead to take some time to
ourselves to do some thinking. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: small;">I can’t help but be symbolic, and see the
occasional rainfall likewise to the occasional downfalls I may have in life.
They’re there, they’re present for sure, but you have to keep positive and keep
remembering that at the end of a storm, comes a rainbow. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: small;">You won’t always be stuck in a rut, you
won’t always be feeling negative or down. Soon enough, the rain will stop, and
the storm will end, and you will be graced by some beautiful sunshine. It is
these times in life we need to hold onto. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: small;">I urge everyone to sit and reflect on what
it is they are grateful for in life, rather than to dwell on those things that
make them feel like they’re the latest star on Days of Our Lives. It’s
important to do that now, to take that time out and realize what’s important, rather
than when the credits start to roll and its too late. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: small;">You might be thankful for your family, your
friends, your relationship, your job, your hobbies, the opportunities you’ve
had, but one thing’s for sure; there are many more great things to come your
way.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: small;">So, keep smiling, keep optimistic and don’t
forget that when one door closes another opens. <i> </i></span><br />
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: x-large;"><i>Life is a beautiful thing. </i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Times,"Times New Roman",serif;">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-size: small;">I understand you’re scared, scared of
losing what you have or scared of not getting what you need. But life’s a bit
like a rollercoaster. You’re scared to death but you go on it anyway for the
thrill because you know that at the end of the rollercoaster you will be okay
and you will have enjoyed yourself. That’s life, so make the most of it. You
will be scared, but at the end of the journey you will be okay. So buckle up
and enjoy the ride. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjiK7plOUiipElEof7vbTENPph1GZkVhFLDlnIf6qmEMFrwXs_uezrFk2SyOXiLmXrz2-GWhilRKrOOSf89bFdJu_Qnu79LPQhFsg8yXRV5qsWCrYpOrdQk__DxgZPtCz1WXG0cwwPsZtg/s1600/bw-rainbow.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="237" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjiK7plOUiipElEof7vbTENPph1GZkVhFLDlnIf6qmEMFrwXs_uezrFk2SyOXiLmXrz2-GWhilRKrOOSf89bFdJu_Qnu79LPQhFsg8yXRV5qsWCrYpOrdQk__DxgZPtCz1WXG0cwwPsZtg/s320/bw-rainbow.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04118985398242690262noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4919791393337480204.post-89260892983433332972012-04-21T21:12:00.002-07:002012-04-21T21:12:11.831-07:00the greatest risk in life is not taking one.<style>
<!--
/* Font Definitions */
@font-face
{font-family:"MS 明朝";
panose-1:0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0;
mso-font-charset:128;
mso-generic-font-family:roman;
mso-font-format:other;
mso-font-pitch:fixed;
mso-font-signature:1 134676480 16 0 131072 0;}
@font-face
{font-family:"Cambria Math";
panose-1:2 4 5 3 5 4 6 3 2 4;
mso-font-charset:1;
mso-generic-font-family:roman;
mso-font-format:other;
mso-font-pitch:variable;
mso-font-signature:0 0 0 0 0 0;}
@font-face
{font-family:Cambria;
panose-1:2 4 5 3 5 4 6 3 2 4;
mso-font-charset:0;
mso-generic-font-family:auto;
mso-font-pitch:variable;
mso-font-signature:-536870145 1073743103 0 0 415 0;}
/* Style Definitions */
p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal
{mso-style-unhide:no;
mso-style-qformat:yes;
mso-style-parent:"";
margin:0cm;
margin-bottom:.0001pt;
mso-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:12.0pt;
font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-font-family:"MS 明朝";
mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast;
mso-hansi-font-family:Cambria;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";
mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;
mso-ansi-language:EN-US;}
.MsoChpDefault
{mso-style-type:export-only;
mso-default-props:yes;
font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-font-family:"MS 明朝";
mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast;
mso-hansi-font-family:Cambria;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";
mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;
mso-ansi-language:EN-US;}
@page WordSection1
{size:595.0pt 842.0pt;
margin:72.0pt 90.0pt 72.0pt 90.0pt;
mso-header-margin:35.4pt;
mso-footer-margin:35.4pt;
mso-paper-source:0;}
div.WordSection1
{page:WordSection1;}
-->
</style>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Confusion takes many forms. You can be
confused about what shoes to wear, what to have for lunch, who to go to the
movies with; or, you can be like me, and be confused about EVERYTHING.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">I have always been a very indecisive
person, that’s for sure. From a young age, I’ve always umm’ed and ahh’ed about
everything, and questioned others ‘I don’t know, what do you think?’. It’s one
of my major faults. I struggle to make a decision, sitting and worrying about
the possible outcomes of each option. It’s just who I am; basically a worrywart
to say the least. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">But now it seems I’m at a point where it’s
not just some insignificant confusion. It’s serious. And the fact that I’m
confused just makes me more confused, which, for a person like me is a huuuuge
issue. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">I don’t want to hurt those around me, but
at the same time, how do I get out of this confused rut? The only way seems to
be to take myself out of these familiar surroundings and let myself be lost.
That way I will have to find my way, I will have to figure it out. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">Growing up does that to people, I think,
and this is my time in life to experience that feeling. That feeling of not
knowing what’s next, of taking that step toward independence, and most of all,
not being confused is one that I crave, and I think now’s the time.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">This year I have off from studies is one
that I plan to take advantage of.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Not
only to make some money, travel, do all that, but also to figure out what I
want in life; to grow. I am still only young, and it’s the perfect time to
figure myself out.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US">It scares me to think that trying to ‘fix’
this confusion could have some negative consequences, but I know that I need to
take responsibility, be fair to myself and others, and take that risk. Because
when all is said and done, <i>the greatest risk in life is not taking one</i>.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEii1M29gJO4OJX_LPQl3gZdkRFpm6wnfDCJUVyxS95Q-jeEwTHX1074SjyzHksSGck__CMCemI7fLIZSXBahdkdFWpKV0gAvcGTtnH-dW6Zg0WxV3IQ9HwweSInMpOUcDkfDoxC6pNWuzU/s1600/800_337.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="212" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEii1M29gJO4OJX_LPQl3gZdkRFpm6wnfDCJUVyxS95Q-jeEwTHX1074SjyzHksSGck__CMCemI7fLIZSXBahdkdFWpKV0gAvcGTtnH-dW6Zg0WxV3IQ9HwweSInMpOUcDkfDoxC6pNWuzU/s320/800_337.jpg" style="cursor: move;" width="320" /></a></div>amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04118985398242690262noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4919791393337480204.post-60768022340728667522012-04-20T21:50:00.005-07:002012-04-22T00:20:07.360-07:00time to find yourself.<style>
<!--
/* Font Definitions */
@font-face
{font-family:"MS 明朝";
mso-font-charset:78;
mso-generic-font-family:auto;
mso-font-pitch:variable;
mso-font-signature:1 134676480 16 0 131072 0;}
@font-face
{font-family:"Cambria Math";
panose-1:2 4 5 3 5 4 6 3 2 4;
mso-font-charset:0;
mso-generic-font-family:auto;
mso-font-pitch:variable;
mso-font-signature:3 0 0 0 1 0;}
@font-face
{font-family:Cambria;
panose-1:2 4 5 3 5 4 6 3 2 4;
mso-font-charset:0;
mso-generic-font-family:auto;
mso-font-pitch:variable;
mso-font-signature:-536870145 1073743103 0 0 415 0;}
/* Style Definitions */
p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal
{mso-style-unhide:no;
mso-style-qformat:yes;
mso-style-parent:"";
margin:0cm;
margin-bottom:.0001pt;
mso-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:12.0pt;
font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-font-family:"MS 明朝";
mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast;
mso-hansi-font-family:Cambria;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";
mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;
mso-ansi-language:EN-US;}
p.MsoNoSpacing, li.MsoNoSpacing, div.MsoNoSpacing
{mso-style-priority:1;
mso-style-unhide:no;
mso-style-qformat:yes;
mso-style-parent:"";
margin:0cm;
margin-bottom:.0001pt;
mso-pagination:widow-orphan;
font-size:12.0pt;
font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-font-family:"MS 明朝";
mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast;
mso-hansi-font-family:Cambria;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";
mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;
mso-ansi-language:EN-US;}
.MsoChpDefault
{mso-style-type:export-only;
mso-default-props:yes;
font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-font-family:Cambria;
mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-fareast-font-family:"MS 明朝";
mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-fareast;
mso-hansi-font-family:Cambria;
mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin;
mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman";
mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;
mso-ansi-language:EN-US;}
@page WordSection1
{size:612.0pt 792.0pt;
margin:72.0pt 90.0pt 72.0pt 90.0pt;
mso-header-margin:36.0pt;
mso-footer-margin:36.0pt;
mso-paper-source:0;}
div.WordSection1
{page:WordSection1;}
-->
</style>
<br />
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span lang="EN-US">Everyone talks about 'finding
themselves', questioning 'who they are' or 'what they stand for'. It's a hard
concept to grasp and one that I have been trying to ascertain for a good few
years now.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span lang="EN-US">I remember being fifteen, and discussing
with my best friend the lyrics to a Taylor Swift song, 'you just might find who
you're supposed to be'. We sat and talked about this concept and I had always
had some fascination with it, some interest in taking some time to 'find
myself'.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span lang="EN-US">Three years on, and I still don't know
whether I've found it. As we all begin to grow up, different things start
happening, it seems as though it's important to know who you are, what you
stand for, your passions, thoughts, morals, everything. And to an extent, I do
know. I know that I am a girl with strong values, and I know that I want to do
everything I can in life to leave my mark on the world. But as an independent
person, how exactly would I define myself?</span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span lang="EN-US">My friends are all beginning to become
their own people; some for the better, others for the worse. But everything in
my life is so stable, so constant, so, well, boring. Don't get me wrong, I love
what I have right now in life, but I question whether this stability is
providing me with such certainty that I will not have that time to myself to
discover this struggled concept 'who am I?'.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span lang="EN-US">Maybe I will never know, but I'm going
to do all it takes to ensure I have done my best to find out. Surrounding
myself with the right people, the right attitudes, the lot. I'm still unsure of
what needs to be done, but I'm sure of one thing;</span></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNoSpacing">
<span lang="EN-US">
<span style="font-size: large;"> <span style="font-size: x-large;">it's time to find myself.</span></span></span></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCrClqYBdUSSMK7PepOVbhtl9yQlTlFyuCDH9TnwpKZ62y346NHL5PRQEat8-YqhKTHhhCVWnuEOQAigAIoODP-lmceQGv-VDY9Kb5tUlL6UMBA8iPBvygHbJULGYqy_xMbKlNRHTnwhI/s1600/tumblr_lw9lp4KwuI1qdksdqo1_500.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCrClqYBdUSSMK7PepOVbhtl9yQlTlFyuCDH9TnwpKZ62y346NHL5PRQEat8-YqhKTHhhCVWnuEOQAigAIoODP-lmceQGv-VDY9Kb5tUlL6UMBA8iPBvygHbJULGYqy_xMbKlNRHTnwhI/s320/tumblr_lw9lp4KwuI1qdksdqo1_500.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>amyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04118985398242690262noreply@blogger.com